The Honest Guide To Building Trust In A Relationship
You can’t improve your life until you prioritize what matters.
If you’re anything like my former self, you’re currently wondering how to build trust & loyalty in your relationship.
Sure, you’re deeply in love with your partner. But let’s be honest: there’s always room for improvement because nothing is ever perfect. As the Greek Philosopher, Epictetus once said:
“Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: Some things are within your control, and some things are not.”
It’s important to remember that you cannot control the actions or thoughts of others. However, you certainly have power over your reaction, and the steps you take to prioritize living a better life.
For the longest time, building trust in a relationship was something that I found difficult. As several girlfriends had previously cheated on me in the past, I’d often overthink every action and wonder if my partner was doing anything behind my back.
We knew that something had to change.
So we began reading articles, watching videos, and doing anything possible to rebuild trust between us. It admittedly wasn’t easy. However, the difference this made in our relationship was incredibly profound.
I’ve realized that most people never have great relationships because they don’t take the necessary steps to build unbreakable levels of trust with their partner. But if you’re not like most people, keep reading.
Here’s what you need to do.
Openly Talk About Your Concerns.
You can read all the relationships & self-help articles you want. But unless you’re willing to create an honest dialogue with your partner, nothing is ever going to change.
We’re often afraid of speaking about the problems on our mind because we don’t want to upset our partner or make the situation worse than it already is. However, it’s impossible to build a meaningful level of trust if you’re not openly discussing whatever is keeping you awake at night.
For the longest time, having conversations about things that troubled me was something I found challenging. I was afraid of standing up for myself & creating unnecessary arguments.
But whenever I summoned the courage to discuss the issues, everything was instantly resolved due to an unwavering commitment to make each other happy. I realized that Seneca was correct when he said: “We suffer more often in imagination than in reality.”
Forgive Your Partner.
Whenever our partner does something we dislike, it’s easy to judge them for their mistakes. But as the Roman Emperor, Marcus Aurelius, once so eloquently wrote:
“Whenever you are about to find fault with someone, ask yourself the following question: What fault of mine most nearly resembles the one I am about to criticize?”
During momentary feelings of anger, it’s easy for us to forget that we also make mistakes, and occasionally act in a manner than others may find frustrating.
But how do you become more forgiving in your relationship? Start by trying to understand the rationale of your partner’s actions, instead of judging them for their imperfections. For example:
- They might have eaten the last cookie due to feeling overwhelmed and wanting a small dose of sugar to lift their spirits.
- Your partner might not want to be intimate in bed because they’re continually overthinking about a stressful event from their day at work.
- They may think it’s okay to change the channel because you have a habit of doing the same thing whenever they’re watching their favorite TV series.
So instead of holding a grudge against your partner for doing something small to annoy you, consider forgiving them for their wrongdoing so you can both progress with your lives.
After all, if you’re looking back at events in the past, you’re not looking forward to creating a better future.
I’m going to leave you with a quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson, who beautifully speaks about the importance of continually improving your mindset:
“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.”
I think we can also look at that quote from the perspective of love. Because if you’re not willing to trust your partner, how can you expect them to do the same for you?
So every day, ask yourself: “What can I do today to be more transparent in my actions, and forgive the mistakes of my partner?”
I’ve discovered that’s a great way to begin building unbreakable levels of trust in your relationship.